Aging Gracefully Appreciators Gifts

"You sure are getting old and fat."

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

"Your contents have shifted."

Do you mind if we stop calling this a "starter house" now?

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

"Trust me kiddo, even donkey's years fly by way too fast..."

"I never thought turning eighty would be so much fun!"

'I'm just not as ambidextrous as I used to be.'

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

A new you. 'First, you've got to stop lying about you age.' It didn't start off well.

"I really have to exercise more. I went from yelling 'Fore' in my 20's, to yelling 'Wow' in my 30's, to yelling 'Ow' in my 50's."

Treat Dispensers for the Middle-Aged

Signs of Aging: Light headedness, shortening, waxy skin, burn out and hot flashes.

"Enjoy yourself while you can because before you know it, you've surpassed your 'Best Used By' date."

An old man exercising with hourglasses

"I can't stay in this hospital bed too long. Everyone will think I'm too old...too fragile...ready for the home. I'm not ready for that!"

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

(Scheduled) Sex, (Prescription) Drugs & (Classic) Rock & Roll

"We REALLY do get better with age."

"It's completely normal for someone your age to develop a taste for butterscotch."

"As the years go by, and my hair recedes, I comb my parting with such sweet sorrow."

"At our age we should be moisturizing." "Honey, we started years ago... with our lips."

"I noticed a few browns."

The Final Selfie

Aging Problems

"Went with the hair plugs I see."

'My - You've matured, my dear.'

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

'I can't believe I'm pretending to be 55 already...'

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

"You're right, they are statins."

"I come from the future."

'Tell the doctor to hurry. It's an emergency. I just turned middle aged!'

"Miriam keeps me young."