Age Perception Philosopher Gifts

'Wow. He looks great for 5!'

A woman is as young as she feels like admitting to.

Saguaro Cactus Regrets.

"I'm here for the hair."

"Don't think of this birthday as you're getting older. Think of it as being one day closer to irritable bowel syndrome."

Senior PGA Moment.

"I know I'm going to get older - but how much?"

Others' perceptions (which aren't always true)

"It's a coming of old age story."

Mall of ages

Realizing that his youth was now behind him, Mr. Twigly left home at the sight of his first gray hare.

"Actually, I'm pretty sure aging naturally and aging gracefully are mutually exclusive."

Balding Autumn Tree.

"You say priorities, I hear suggestions."

"Date of birth?" "1989." "In 1989 I couldn't make ice... still can't." "Good lord, she could be my daughter! I'm so #!@* old." "That's the year my wife left me. Now I have a cold and I'm depressed!"

"Do you know the biggest thing I've learned in my thirty nine years?"

"Seventy-five isn't the new anything."

'What superpower would I like? Normally, invisibility, but as I'm a 53 year old female, I feel that I've already been granted it.'

'I wish I could look just like Elvis.'

'My doctor didn't have enough replacement parts, so I'm just getting by on two cylinders.'

'But my mom says that 40 is the new 30.'

"Who knew a lifeless box could spread such fear? It came from the mailbox."

"So, Ms. Mayfly. Where do you see yourself in five years?"

"Look at it this way - the more birthdays you have, the longer you live!"

Happy Birthday!

"The older I get, the more I change from a lounge lizard into a bathroom lizard..."

'-and in human years I'm the same age as George Clooney!'

"I hope I age as well as you, Dad. Except for the neck."

Highway of Life. No, Ernie, we're on cruise control. It just seems like we're going faster the further we go. (Published originally on March 6, 2014.)

I always think of old age as ten years older than I am.

'Well, you know what the say...near death is the new 80.'

"'Old enough to have been thrown off a spinning Merry-Go-Round.' Could you be more specific about your age?"

The march of time, "Have you noticed how all the umpires seem to be getting younger"

"If I were a dog I'd only be 11."

"On the bright side, you are embracing aging magnificently."