"Date of birth?" "1989." "In 1989 I couldn't make ice... still can't." "Good lord, she could be my daughter! I'm so #!@* old." "That's the year my wife left me. Now I have a cold and I'm depressed!"
Age Comedian Gifts
Looking for a gift that captures the witty charm of an aging comedian? Our curated collection features humorous and thoughtful items that celebrate comedy, aging gracefully, and a good laugh. Whether it’s for a comedy lover or someone who appreciates the art of humor, these gifts add a fun twist to their day and showcase their love for comedy in a personal way.
No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.
"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"
The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'
"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."
"Tight......this isn't tight...now a New York City apartment......that's tight."
"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."
The Signing of tthe United States Constitution
I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....
"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."
Zombie standup
Showbiz Awards
"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."
"'I don't want war'. . . well, wither our translation program is broke or this president has a strange kind of humor!"
Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.
In his younger days Spock was quite the comedian.
"Another dry scotch Manhattan, Mike. Make it a double."
"If I might be serious for a moment..."
12 O'clock was 'I'm a tractor time.'
"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"
Trump pardons
'Your French dip, sir.'
'The circle is complete!'
Boneheads! I never said I was bringing ten condiments!
THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK
"Aristophanes explains comedy"
'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'
To no ones surprise, they ran head-on into one another. (All couples are wearing teachers reading 'I'm with Stupid'.)
No-Work Orange
"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."
If a bunch of crazy red headed clowns come out that door...Run like you've never ran before!
Shakespeare does stand-up comedy in the round.
"We're following Carrot Top."
The Rooster Comedian.
"Don't worry - I'm here for the television."
Age Comedian Gifts Collection
Age Comedian Mugs
Explore our collection of mugs that celebrate humorous aging and the comedy of life's golden years. Perfect for the coffee enthusiast with a punchline.
Age Comedian Pillows
Discover pillows with witty sayings and humorous designs that pay tribute to the aging comedy star in your life.
Age Comedian Prints
Browse our art prints showcasing the humor and wisdom of aging comedians—great for decorating a comedy fan’s favorite space.
Age Comedian T-Shirts
Check out our funny t-shirts inspired by aging comedians—ideal for those who love to wear their humor on their sleeve.