Afterlife Scribe Gifts

"Give it up, Carl. You’ve been dead for six months. You’re not gonna finish the novel."

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

"Surgery up here is free!"

"All we have left is standing room only."

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

"I do tech support for the cloud."

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

'Stocks plummeted on news of your demise.'

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

"Before we decide if you can get in we have to watch a film review of your life..."

'Maximising shareholder value doesn't count.'

'You certainly lived a remarkable life. Any chance you'll get over yourself?'

"I was a primary school teacher. What did you do?"

"As we're here for eternity, I expected at least a television."

"Oh nooo, we can't skip church. Why, we'll just sleep when we're dead!"

CartoonStock Upload

A Male Angel throwing his Halo as a Frisbee for his Dog to catch.

Gates of heaven

Postcards from Heaven...

"Yes, this is heaven - but we need some source of funding, too."

'Boy, that felt good! I can see why the devil has so much fun. And no, I'm not letting you in! But tell him I said hello.'

'Can't talk now, I'm just going into a tunnel.'

"If you can't take it with you, this must be Hell."

'You still can't take it with you, but we now offer cloud storage for intellectual properties.'

Post-psychoanalysis

"The last thing I remember was asking my broker if all my money had been in risk-free bonds."

'Listen, if they didn't have alcohol in heaven, it wouldn't be heaven!'