Afterlife Communicator Gifts

'That's right, Peters... Cancel ALL of my appointments, buy a Ouija board, and learn how to use it. I'll be in touch.'

'Wait! What's this? A text message from the other side.'

"We've made contact. Here's a tweet from your late husband."

"How can you be out of wings?"

"Good game."

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

"I was hoping there'd be no meetings here."

"Surgery up here is free!"

"All we have left is standing room only."

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

Ducks and hares taken in by a wolf at a seance

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

"Wait, am I hear for you or are you here for me?"

"I just know he's gonna ask me why I voted for Trump."

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

'Stocks plummeted on news of your demise.'

Get out of the way, Harold - I'm trying to talk to Cuddles.

..and with our new spirit website you can keep in touch with all your dead friends!

"Before we decide if you can get in we have to watch a film review of your life..."

"He really isn't bad, per se, but he is kind of a jerk."

"I'd have been here sooner if it hadn't been for early detection."

'Maximising shareholder value doesn't count.'

'I don't want this job. I worked all my life and retired. I like being retired.'

"I know you've been together a long time, but I'm sorry... Your microbiome can't follow you in."

'You certainly lived a remarkable life. Any chance you'll get over yourself?'

"I was a primary school teacher. What did you do?"

"When I get to heaven do you think I'll get my testicles back?"

"We'll be single again in Heaven, right?"

'I chose here since heaven won't allow you to take your bonus and golden parachute with you.'

'I know you don't belong here, but if we let you go to Heaven, we couldn't not guarantee your safety.'

"You think it's tough down there?"