Afterlife Reflection Gifts

"I've got about 20 pages of questionable internet comments here."

"Can I use my frequent flier miles?"

'You mean we still have birthdays?'

"I know, boy—I miss the smoked salmon at Zabar's, too."

"Remember me? You caught me on the Beaverkill, opening day, 1952."

'Have a nice eternity.'

"How can you be out of wings?"

"Good game."

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

Cat Heaven vs Mouse Hell.

"I was hoping there'd be no meetings here."

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

"Surgery up here is free!"

"It's true: no more burpees."

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

"I thought there would be bacon here."

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

"You are running low on cloud storage space. Please upgrade your account to continue."

"I just know he's gonna ask me why I voted for Trump."

'Pre-existing conditions - What did YOU die of?'

'Yeah, I know your idea of heaven is to play golf all day, but all we have is shuffleboard!'

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

'Stocks plummeted on news of your demise.'

'Of course the Johnsons got the big cloud.'

'Welcome to Heaven. By the way, here's your favorite club you lost on that course 28 years ago.'

"Only one of my lives was a bowl of cherries."

'So that's why I didn't get that train set? !'.

"I don't want any old ones, I want my own back..."