Afterlife Reflection Gifts

"I've got about 20 pages of questionable internet comments here."

"Can I use my frequent flier miles?"

'You mean we still have birthdays?'

"I know, boy—I miss the smoked salmon at Zabar's, too."

"Remember me? You caught me on the Beaverkill, opening day, 1952."

'Have a nice eternity.'

'Life really was short, I should have eaten more chocolate.'

"How can you be out of wings?"

"Good game."

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

Cat Heaven vs Mouse Hell.

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

"I was hoping there'd be no meetings here."

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

"Surgery up here is free!"

Hell Separates Real Madrid and Barcelona fans.

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

"I thought there would be bacon here."

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

"It's true: no more burpees."

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

"You are running low on cloud storage space. Please upgrade your account to continue."

"I just know he's gonna ask me why I voted for Trump."

'Pre-existing conditions - What did YOU die of?'

'Yeah, I know your idea of heaven is to play golf all day, but all we have is shuffleboard!'

'Stocks plummeted on news of your demise.'

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

'This is way better than a litter box.'