Afterlife Explorations Gifts

"They said you can't take it with you. . . and you believed them?"

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

Cat Heaven vs Mouse Hell.

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"Actually, I'm still on life support. I just came by to do a feasibility study."

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

"Surgery up here is free!"

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

The Gospel According To Jane Brody"Orange, come in. Apple, come in. Hey you, frankfurter, hold it right there."

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

Hell Separates Real Madrid and Barcelona fans.

"All we have left is standing room only."

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

"I thought there would be bacon here."

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

"Needs to get a life"

"It's true: no more burpees."

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

A surprise in heaven

"I do tech support for the cloud."

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

'Pre-existing conditions - What did YOU die of?'

"You are running low on cloud storage space. Please upgrade your account to continue."

"I just know he's gonna ask me why I voted for Trump."

'Yeah, I know your idea of heaven is to play golf all day, but all we have is shuffleboard!'

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

"Damnit—Every game ends in stalemate."

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

'Look man, no wings!'

"That's Bob. He's a bit of a wing nut."

"Sweetie, I'm back from the dead!"