Adulthood Adventurer Gifts

'Bet you were beginning to think I'd never leave home.'

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

'I have this fear of the real world...'

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

'Hi hon! How's the little monster?'

"One year closer to college!"

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

"Needs to get a life"

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

A surprise in heaven

"I do tech support for the cloud."

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

Saint Peter will sometimes put on a disguise just to play a prank on the new arrivals.

The Impractical Guide to having a baby.

Halo Frisbee.

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

'Unfortunately, there's no cure. It's called growing older.'

"I told you to pack a damned sweater."

Duel in a wheelchair.

Free ticket to heaven... details inside

"My husband's the academic. I just like to travel. I'm more of a pandemic."

'You sloth and gluttony guys have it easy -- I'm here for envy!'

"Can he call you back? He and his mid-life crisis are celebrating their tenth anniversary."

"Your long-range investments would have made you a very wealthy man."

'How many fingers do you see?'

Speedo Limit: 21 Years

"All I ask is a chance to ruin my life in my own way."

"Even if I did believe that he was communicating through you. I'm afraid it's too late to change the will now."