Adulthood Adventurers Gifts

'I have this fear of the real world...'

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"One year closer to college!"

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

I sometimes feel spotted, but I never really feel seen.

"It's true: no more burpees."

"Needs to get a life"

Inside One's Memory Bank

A surprise in heaven

"I do tech support for the cloud."

"It's a beautiful world out there, just waiting to be discovered. Well, discovered by one of you, the rest will almost certainly die."

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

'Pre-existing conditions - What did YOU die of?'

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

I used to love coming here. Nudist beach.

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

Saint Peter will sometimes put on a disguise just to play a prank on the new arrivals.

'This is way better than a litter box.'

Halo Frisbee.

'Unfortunately, there's no cure. It's called growing older.'

Free ticket to heaven... details inside

"I told you to pack a damned sweater."

"That's Bob. He's a bit of a wing nut."

"Your long-range investments would have made you a very wealthy man."

Duel in a wheelchair.

"Can he call you back? He and his mid-life crisis are celebrating their tenth anniversary."

"Mom said Dad pulled a groin surfing Mendocino. When will he realize he's not 60 anymore?"

'You sloth and gluttony guys have it easy -- I'm here for envy!'

Speedo Limit: 21 Years