Adult Sibling Gifts

"They said it couldn't be done – I made a friend as an adult!"

"Hey, Eli, would you and your little friend mind getting as far away from me as humanly possible?"

Licenced Day Care.

"I'm sorry I didn't find your wallet but I found six pairs of reading glasses!"

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

Come dine with me!

The Art Student.

"Ahhh... close enough."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Bond James, Bond."

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

Glastonbury. After.

'I have this fear of the real world...'

Polly txt speak

"These aren’t the droids you’re looking for."

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

At the Museum

Grace For Flies

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

I like the Jets...I guess

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

Unable to raise enough money for a trip to Paris, the Bartlesville High French Club had to settle for three days in Tulsa.

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

"My political platform focuses on more ice cream and more frisbee chasing, with less chores and fewer baths."

Packaging Russian Dolls

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."