Young Sibling Gifts

"How am I supposed to think about consequences before they happen?"

'You gotta learn to talk, Jeffrey -- it's part of the aging process.'

'This one holds 1200 songs AND it automatically screens out all the ones your parents could stand.'

What do you want, the moon on a stick?

'The real story behind the Princess and the Pea.' A queen saying to a little girl eating, 'Eat all your peas or else you'll have to put them under your mattress.'

"I don't care if you saw this in a western..."

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

Boy and Bear and Monster

6th Grade Do-You-Own Research Fair

"Gracie, you can't spend the next four days waiting here for Christmas!"

Magnet School. A "magnet school"? Won't that mess up the computers?

Support Small Business Lemonade Stand

"I'm wearing my mom's fitness tracker to count my jumps, flips, and adrenaline rushes."

"I don't get it either, but my mom keeps telling me to hang up the phone, so I do it to make her happy."

"It's not fair that ice cream melts, but broccoli doesn't."

"You're a very good hall monitor, Billy, but we don't detain teachers."

"Free siding for our house? Sure why not!"

'I've been told before that I'm very mature for a three year old.'

'Is this one of those deals where the names have been changed to protect the innocent?'

'...and it absolutely must be assembled!'

Four balloons

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

'He's nice enough, but it's hard to get an intelligent conversation out of him.'

At the Museum

A balloon vendor hands a child his only 'good' face out of many,less than desireable faces.

'Nope. I didn't see any dogfish.'

'I've been watering myself by taking showers. How come I'm not growing as tall as your plants?'

Fade to black...

The Quack Quack Diaries: The Triumphant Return Of Cap'n Quack!

George Washington's sister was always getting him into trouble.

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

The Charge of the Kids

"Better luck next time, kid."

I think you meant to huff 'n' puff at the next house over.