Older Siblings Gifts

"As a Baby Boomer, I never thought the boom would be the sound of my retirement accounts collapsing."

The Woodstock Medical-Emergency Tent - 1994

'It's our 10 year plan.'

"What's creaking...you or the floor?"

'Front row on the new roller coaster: It doesn't get any better than this.'

"I've decided to start groaning every time I have to move my body a little bit."

"It's so much easier now that the children are our age."

Baby beluga, middle child beluga, firstborn beluga

'You think you've got it tough? Let me tell you how it was when I was your age!'

"I'm trying to stay away from Tia Carmen. When she sees me, she treats me like a little kid."

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

Car travelling through a 'Midlife Park' with people knitting and reading the paper.

'I've reached an age where there's nothing to look forward to but nostaliga.'

'Nothin' beats a wild block party.'

"Adulits don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAAAH!"

"No more diapers. Simply lift the lid and go here."

"Remember the good old days, when all we had to worry about was a dollar-sixty-a-pound sirloin?"

"Sitting on a beanbag doesn't take me back to the seventies- it just makes me wonder how I'm ever going to get up again."

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

Joey discovers the difference between coffee beans and jelly beans.

"Bond James, Bond."

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

Grace For Flies

At the Museum

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

I like the Jets...I guess

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

Wildlife

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

"I know what this is, it's what mum and dad call 'working from home'...

"I can't protect you from everything, but I can read you stories that make you believe I can protect you from everything."

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

Santa Claus's Mail