Adult Film Star Gifts

Porn Pioneer

Leslie Caron.

Emotion of Mr. Kenwigs on hearing the family news from Nicholas

'The good teen-age mime chooses to study for an exam, while the bad one chooses to steal hubcaps.'

"The script isn't funny, but maybe if we put some unfunny actors in it and get an unfunny director it will be funny."

Wizard of Oz - repeat fees

Eva Mendez

“Look! We’re on the naked cam!”

"BBC One’s Casualty has reached its 1000th episode. The long-running hospital drama is apparently very popular with viewers... But even more popular among jobbing actors."

Nick Cave

Woody Allen

"Sorry. I'm out of leprecondoms."

"Oh, you haven’t seen holiday drama ‘till you’ve met our little family."

Drama Llama

"Accepting for..."

"Abra-Viagra."

An early turning-point in old Hollywood...

Janet Leigh

"I'm sorry. We don't want a ring-tailed lemur. We want a ring-tailed-lemur type."

Robert Morley

"Worthy of an Oscar don't you think?"

Father Christmas.

'Is somebody here implying that I was not really sick?' (Best Actor award on his desk.)

S&M Lovers, "Not tonight dear... I haven't got a headache."

Performance anxiety lessons, the more you practice something.

'So do I get the job or not?'

'Dirty, lesbian, whore, bitch, gang bangs turned out to be Finding Nemo!'

Covid Masks

"For a living? I make pornographic films. Your daughter didn't tell you?"

Christopher Ecclestone.

Ghost Porn

Louise Brooks caricature

Trevor Eve

Your Ticket to Fame and Fortune...sold out.

Movies About Military Families