Acomplaining Gifts

'I'll tell you what life's all about...'

'Almost everything I have hurts and what doesn't hurt doesn't work!'

"Whine and cheezed party."

Man from refuse department says: 'We'll send you a new wheelie bin, Mrs Trubshaw, there's really no need to 'orchestrate a mass Twitter campaign'.'

Only two months since school started. How long do you get off for summer break, Rudy? Oh, months and months. Just to kick back, sleep in late, have a great time with zero responsibility. Waaaa. Introduction to sarcasm. And I get tons of recess.

"What a day. I almost lost my smug look of detached superiority."

"I finally have an ailment that isn't so bad that I'm worried, but bad enough for me to complain about constantly"

'Typical, I hadn't finished complaining about the rain...'

Meeting at the Grumpy Old Men's Pub.

Welcome to Yosemite, Hell on Earth!

'This decaf's lousy.'

"Frankly, I can't really understand why my husband would be referred to as a "Domestic Cat": he does nothing around the house..."

"In what way do you feel you have been unfairly treated?"

"Is it always so cloudy?"

'I don't like to complain, Evelyn, but aren't these family reunions getting out of hand?'

Bob's whine cellar.

Medical Bracelet

'To be honest, you're the only one who sometimes bothers to hear my complaints.'

"True, the fly is not in my soup. But it took one taste of my soup and dropped dead."

"To be perfectly honest, Tarquin, I get fed up listening to your stories about 'the good old days'."

'What the hell good are new federal regulations if they don't have teeth?'

Ryanair refunds

'Aren't you done yet? This is taking forever! I should have went somewhere else!...'

"One more remark like that, lady, and you'll never get to see this show."

"I heard you are charging a monthly fee for using your debit card, and I'm here to complain!"

'And I don't appreciate being left on hold,with Motorhead's 'The ace of spades'!'

Customer Service. I only handle complaints -- What you have is a beef?

"Waiter, there's a greenfly in my soup!"

'I'm just going to our front gate for a chunner!'

'I need to work a different shift.'

But the brochures says breakfast in bed! Yes, only if you carry your bed down to the dining room!

"Where does it hurt?"

"I know I should Fuggedaboutit but I can't."

"I want to complain about how long I've had to queue to make my complaint."

'Sure I had the world on a string, sittin' on a rainbow, but my finger turned blue and my hemorrhoids were killing me!'