Accident Prone Individuals Gifts

The Old Good Cop/Bad Cop Routine.

Beware of Falling Notice.

"You run into a window, too?"

Rollerblader wears a cast and has wheels on crutches

'This is your lucky day!'

'I bet those are the accident reports.'

'Fred, didn't I tell you to wear a helmet?'

"...Bug bites, barbecue and lawn mower...and you?"

'Will you watch where you're going with that thing?'

'The car has power steering... but the driver doesn't!'

'Quick! Contact my doctor!'

Broken ankle.

"...And your underpants were unusually clean for someone who got hit by a bus."

'Oops! Maybe I should've put this sign out a little earlier.'

"I sprained it trying to open my medicine."

Just Do It. Just Did It.

I've got sharp pains in my ribs after playing sports.... - 'It's porbably muscular... just take pain killers.' - 'Could it be a cracked rib though?' - 'Possibly.' - 'What would I do if it was a cracked rib?' - 'Take more painkillers.' -

You're in luck! I'm the doctor who'll be patching you up after the match.

Wife to doctor about husband: 'It was a freak accident. He was doing some work on the house.'

Medical insurance reminder

Attack of footballs.

"I raced a train to the level crossing. It was a tie."

Murphy and his brother 'sod' at work on their now famous law.

"Sorry I didn't return your calls of earlier today."

Life on Earth - dog bandage.

"Oh, that's Mr Norris. He's our risk analyst."

"That's chemical law for you. No matter how minor the damage claim, our fee is always major."

"I slipped on a bar of soap in the bathtub, and my gun went off."

"Did you make all these 911 calls?"

Roller blader with bandaged head

"I spilled my drink on my laptop, now it won't work. I'm hoping there's a statute of limitations that will get me out of being punished."

'Dave, I dropped my lunch box. Could you please look for it? Dave ... '

Misery Loves Co., Inc.

The bad news is Wally fell in the sander. The good news is he's nice and smooth!