Academic Improvement Gifts

'My grades could be better if the school had a data driven, evidence based curriculum in the classroom.'

"Psssst. Fix your report card?"

"His grades are in free fall, John. How can we get him to focus?"

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

Albania and North Macedonia: entrance denied

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

Pretty Flowers

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

Eternal Student.

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

'Intelligent Design? My arse!'

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

'So...you THINK you have what it takes to be a scientist...?'

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

Molecular Biology and Cosmology buildings

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

"Is it that bad?"

"Meet the scribe"

Postgraduates A group of posts on their way to class.

Academic Idol - 'Professor Johannsen's paper was zippy. It had robust vocabulary and I almost felt that I could dance to it. I would give it a 7.'