Zoom Humorist Gifts

"We need to talk about your Zoom presence."

City Zoo: Day Care

Football Chameleon

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

"The Eggsorcist"

A man sees Zeus throwing lightning bolts on the balcony of his apartment.

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

"I’ve heard of them barking at the moon, but never scatting at the sun."

“Someone is not muted. I'm still hearing ambient noise. Please mute your device.”

Large print e-book.

"[UNABLE TO PROCESS THIS IMAGE]"

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

The mysterious ancient stone figures of Keister Island.

'Anybody who has a life, gets more work.'

'You say you're having trouble seeing into the future'

'If asked, we should all agree that this seminar never happened.'

"It's not my fault - how was I to know you'd look scary with your clothes off?"

"Your problem isn't the prescription."

Artist uses connect-the-dots canvas to paint nude model.

"So, Owen tells me you guys met in art school."

'Point of clarification, sir. Are you still in charge, or have you ceded power to your sock puppet?'

Nude conductor of Orchestra conducting 'The full Monte-verdi'

The team wondered if he would ever fit in.

Murphy bed...Murphy.

"Do you think those clams we ate were a little off?"

'You got much on at the moment?'; 'No, nothing really.' (Naked man)

"Gracie, you're a good mud artist."

"You know, crime doesn't pay... at least at your level."

'Man, when was the last time you had your eyes tested?'

"I'm here because my vision is getting so bad I can't even see clearly in my dreams at night!"

'Guess who I bumped into today? EVERYBODY!'

'My 434 novels are very similar to Terry Pratchetts apart from the fact that they've never been published.'

'Unknown fact: Cows aren't grazing...they're searching for their contact lenses.'