Zodiac Zester Gifts

"Your moon is in the House of Pancakes."

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

'It wouldn't work - you're Leo and I'm Sagittarius.'

"...Wow, if Malcolm Gladwell is right, we need to get a cat who's a Virgo ASAP!"

'If you had been born two days later you'd have been kind and clever with a great sense of humour.'

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."

Yeah, well, I only failed my logic exam because I'm a Pisces and my professor's a Leo.

'No kidding! I'm a Leo too!'

Ill next Thursday

"As an astronomer, this discovery heralds a new golden age of academic fervor for mathematicians and astrophysicists across the globe. As a Sagittarius, I'm fucked."

Yeah, well, I only failed my logic exam because I'm a Pisces and my professor's a Leo.

'You're a water sign and I'm an earth sign. . .Together we're mud.'

Year of the Rat

"So, what is your star sign?"

It says, you're going to meet a nice Pisces for a romantic dinner.

'Yeah, I'm a trife scorpio - what of it?'

Mama Z'Belle...astrologer...your fortune based on the science of astronomy: 'Oh, oh it looks like your chart has shifted red...'

'Don't you think it's strange that all snakes are Aries, Taurus or Gemini...?'

"I'd be a lot more comfortable with a Pisces."

"No, I'm afraid Pluto is never in the dog house."

Eve makes a discovery with far reaching ramifications. Our star signs aren't compatible.

'Hmphh, your horoscope says you're going to have a date, with a Taurus, and I'm a Gemini.'

'It wouldn't work - you're Leo and I'm Sagittarius.'

Al, you look nonplussed. I just heard that they discovered a new astrological sign, and my birthday now falls under the sign of the jackass.

"29 degrees in Scorpio? What's that in Fahrenheit?"

"So tell me what's your sign?"

'I don't believe in astrology. I think that's because I'm a Leo.'

I knew my niche market would someday be validated! It's the blue-eyed, left handed, Sagittarius network!

'What's my fortune then?!

"It's my New Year!"

'Ha ha! You've been afraid of someone else's future!'

'Why, yes, I am a Capricorn...how did you know?'

'Your experimental protocol fails to take into consideration, the astrological signs of the fruit flies.'

"Libra (September 23-October 23): Busy, busy, busy."

Horoscope: Sagittarius. You could visualize the results of some of your plans when the perfect partner comes to your aid.