Youngster Gifts

"Ambitions . . . to catch the Loch Ness Monster"

"Next year, let's wish for a pony."

"Just be yourself."

Joey discovers the difference between coffee beans and jelly beans.

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

'Are you sure I should read my book report to the class? --�It's PG-13.'

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"By the way, the failing grades you'll be seeing-they won't be virtual."

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

"Well, young man... just consider yourself grounded!"

A Punk Rocker Cocoon.

"Yeah, I got into trouble, but I think the principal really enjoyed my rendition of 'I Did It My Way.'"

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

It's a radical new development, a text novel for the text generation

"We’ve nailed guitar-solo-face. Time to try playing instruments."

"Check it out! In nature, females are in charge...they select their mates!"

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN!, 'Boy, talk about psychobabbl!'

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

'Good night, Dear. Text me if you need anything.'

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

"Recess does things to a man."

"It's called, 'Goth'."

"Remember, kids, it's not winning that matters, it's getting a clean urine sample that's important."

'Let's see what else will explode in the microwave!'

Timpani.

'You can stick your filthy shell. I'm listening to the Arctic Monkeys.'

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

'I'm not doing well in Chemistry - I'm out of my element.'