Young Pharmacist Gifts

"Let's play make-believe. I'll diagnose you with a life-threatening illness, then cure you with a wonder-drug that turns out to be a placebo."

I should be a writer when I grow up...

'The creative process works best with a relaxed brain, so I'm letting my mind wander to let a solution drift in.'

'But Dad, all the other kids get a roth IRA as part of their allowance package.'

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

'What goes up, must come down!' 'Not if you give it enough thrust, to send it flying forever across the face of the universe.'

'Son, it's time we had that little talk about ornithology and entomology.'

'Take two tootsie rolls and call me in the morning.'

Little doctor.

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

"I'll go to my room and do my homework, but I want time and a half."

"So much for password protected."

"The old tricks, young fellow, have served me well."

"Police? My son and his friends were playing, building a moon rocket. . . I believe that they actually blasted off!"

I think he knows something that we don't know about the uranium molecule.

'I've crunched the numbers and you can afford to increase my allowance by 15.5%.'

"We've decided to diversify our funds on some candy!"

"Dinosaurs are cool!"

'How could it have been rough for you back in Pharmacy school, Dad? You only had penicillin and aspirin.'

"Reverend, if we're born again in Jesus...do we get another belly button?"

"I'm taking detailed notes of everything, so I can tell my kids what things were really like when I was their age."

'I can't afford to absorb the overhead anymore!'

'Just for kicks, let's come up with something that has a good side effect.'

"I forget. If I have an adverse reaction, do I call my doctor or my lawyer?"

'Junior wrote his first memo today!'

Little girl playing childrens hospital

'Ever since you told your son he has blue blood, he's been telling everyone he's a Martian.'

"I think you should provide a 401(k) with my allowance."

"He's a whiz kid."

Child with a junior chemistry set in the complaints department.

Side Effects

Placebonex: 'Make sure to take it every day, otherwise the effect wears off.'

'I can explain - I'm doing a school project on the breaking-point of glass . . .'