Foodie Pharmacist Gifts

"Take on an empty stomach? Don't you have anything I can take with food?"

"It does have a side effect. You'll faint when I tell you how much it will cost to produce."

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

'Sometimes, laughter is the best medicine.'

'Hmphh. Happy as clams, indeed. They're just all on Prozac.'

"That new drug causes flatulence."

Medicinal plants

"You only need one prescription. The other 7 are for the side effects."

"You won’t find a more effective antidepressant."

Laxatives - "I'm after some comic relief."

"In school we learned about Staten Island. Is that where they make all those pills you take?"

Surgeon carving a chicken/turkey.

'Side effects may include....'

"This alphabet soup is in Times New Roman. I ordered Segoe Script! May I please speak to the chef?"

Antihistamine Rally At National Sinus Cavity

'This prescription will stimulate your funny bone which will cause you to laugh. We both know that laughter is the best medicine.'

'Dorothy - we're not in the health food section anymore.'

You'll see the food is excellent, but the service is far too slow....

'I think we should cut back on the tranquilizers.'

Doctors

Doctor uses thermometer to check chicken.

"Let's play make-believe. I'll diagnose you with a life-threatening illness, then cure you with a wonder-drug that turns out to be a placebo."

'My purse! The original 24-hour pharmacy.'

'What I call a miracle drug is one that doesn't start a government investigation.'

'How do you think he stays so merry through the holidays?!'

'How could it have been rough for you back in Pharmacy school, Dad? You only had penicillin and aspirin.'

"I cranked up the dose a tad. Why should kids have all the fun?"

'One placebo or two, doctor?'

'Have there been any side effects from the medicine?'

Medication for the elderly

Funny, this is the same pill the head of the price-gouging drug company needs to take so he can sleep at night, too. Pharmac …

Man sees hug capsules: 'Not to be taken Orally.'

"What SPF sunscreen do you suggest for lying around in a sunny spot?"