Young Parent Pillows

'Sorry, sweetie -- they're not that kind of cookies.'

"No, four glasses of water was enough. . . now I have to go to the bathroom!"

TAP TAP TAP TAP

"That's all I get? A sonogram? No tracking number?"

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

'He's not talking yet, but his texting skills are excellent...'

Next gen pregnancy tests.

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

"That table is yours once that party decides to move to the suburbs."

A child sitting on a swing - while playing with a hand-held electronic device or phone

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

"Oh, Frank, look! He's sending his first tweet!"

"He just said his first word!"

Amazon Drones Delivering Babies

'Those are my triplets. Com, Net and Org Barnes.'

"Never mind Benjamin – he just lawyers-up to get attention."

Kid is 'Born to Text'.

"Congratulations. The ultrasound shows the baby is healthy, a boy and already knows more about technology than you."

"If I turn it up I might get out of here quicker!"

Toddler Feeding Solutions

"Mum's biological clock is ticking away...OOPS!...my mistake. That's indigestion."

Baby's First Words... Hi Guys!

Baby, baby maker

'Don't worry about gaining weight after the baby - you'll run it off during the toddler years.'

'OK Mr and Mrs Johnson let's spin the wheel and find you a child!'

"With the baby-cam, there is no privacy."

"I told you not to touch it. I should've used your language and told you not to click on it."

-THIRTY thousand? I thought you wanted TEN thousand? -I'm having triplets!

"I brought frankincense." "I brought gold." "I brought diapers!" "A wise woman!"

You're right-this is way better than a standing desk.

"Dear Mum. As contractions begin I thank you for letting me share your uterus. When do I get my bond money back??"

A father comes home from work and is given a baby.