Yard Jokers Pillows

Boy: 'DAD, the lawnmower's started SMOKING again!'

"Let's save a few so we can continue to piss off the neighbors for the next few weeks."

'I don't remember this canoe being this heavy, do you Tom?'

"Must get a longer cable."

The Return of the Germ

When Fred's super deluxe leaf blower blew up yet again, he wondered where global deforestation is when you want it,

'How could I have missed these? I took a multivitamin.'

Man mowing lawn that grows quicker then he can cut it!

'Look...it's almost empty! Those pesky birds need to quit stealin' the food out of this squirrel feeder!'

"You, my tenacious weed, are trespassing!"

"Honest, Dad, somethin's wrong with the lawnmower." "You look fine to me. When you finish the lawn and pullin weeds feel free to wash the car and paint the house."

'If I get dizzy, and pass out there's a cherry danish in my lunch box.'

'No, he's right. Cows have three udders. One for skim milk, one for two percent and the third one's for lactose free.'

Born Cynical,,,,

Autumn Only $5 Per Bag

"I don't care how much the petrol costs for the strimmer. Get it cut!"

Welcome to the Garden of Weedin'

Blower wars.

'Wouldn't it be funny if it was just out of gas?'

"Is this the ride on lawn mower you advertised?"

"Do you realize we still have a huge bag of leaves from last year?"

"This is a letter from your teacher. Are you seriously eating your own homework?"

"If you kids must have food fights, try not to do it when the cafeteria is serving soup."

'I come from a long line of Sunday roasts...'

Man cutting grass.

'I know it's overgrown - we can't find our house!'

'It's a perfect day. The sun is shining, the birds are singing and the lawnmower is broken.'

'Oooh. . . I don't feel good...'

'You complain that you have no outside interests so I've bought you a lawn mower!'

Hoarder Collie

Shooting Leaves

'G is for the God-awful food we were served...U is for the uncomfortable chairs...'

'I'll just have time to finish the yard before the next bombing run begins.'