Yard Humor Appreciator Pillows

Blower wars.

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

Dedication to excellence....

Beginning Yarder.

"And I put it to you Mr. MacDonald, that on the morning of December 3rd, you had cold hands whilst attaching a milking machine to my client's udder!"

Lawn Order. It's a landscaping show about maintaining a tidy yard.

"You see a bunny rabbit in the clouds. I see mom telling me to mow the lawn."

"That's... yikes. I mean... what's even going on down there? Honey, I don't think a push-up bra is very flattering on you."

Farmyard Sinatra - "Start spreadin'...Manure

"When the heck did leaf blowers become grass blowers?!"

"Well, I thought I'd give fencing a try, but I sucked at it."

"Start talking."

"I call it decking - it will be all the rage in a few years."

'The cow mooed, the pig oinked, the chicken clucked, I baaed and then we adjourned.'

Leaves.

'Just so you know, leaning on a rake and looking at the sky is not 'yard work', and thus may not be entered into your 'I do so help around the house' defense.'

"Hey how do you spell Abominable?"

WRONG! A veterinary school failure.

Peripheral vision cow

Everything you always wanted to know about slop, but were afraid to ask...

"As weed-whackers go, it's a little quiet for my taste."

I slept funny last night!

One of their favourite games was to pull the wool over their eyes.

Man uses leaf blower to blow cat from treetop.

"We climbed three thousand feet up Mont Blanc to get that one."

"And that's why I don't have a steaming pile of s**t in my back yard."

Upon returning to school, none of the boys could help but notice how much Allison had developed over summer vacation.

You had me at 'BLLLLUUUURRRPPPP!'

Grazer's block

"Is this the ride on lawn mower you advertised?"

"This job nothing to crow about."

"Do you think it's time to switch from the blower to the mower?"

"This is fresh to the market, and there's no chain, so nothing stopping you from getting right up to the gate when the postman arrives."

Charlie Dimmock T-shirts for gardeners.

'Do you want to buy this cow from 'Windy Field Farm'?'