Yard Explorer Gifts

'I don't make house calls. My mom won't let me leave the yard.'

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

Pumpkin patch

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

You're dead to me, Marsha. And that's just the way I like it."

'This is the BEST well we've dug!!'

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

I think it's so cute when the kids camp out in the backyard.

Beginning Yarder.

"I don't think you can call two ants a 'bug safari'."

'We drove 800 miles for this? If I wanted to look at a roomful of dusty bottles, we could have visited your mother.'

Woman watering garden with watering can. Bug with umbrella up.

'Hey, what am I, chopped liver?'

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

"Must get a longer cable."

Dung beetle to other dung beetle - 'Now what do we do with it' Reply - 'Beats me'

'It says right here on the package, Ed, 'avoid any direct contact with skin'!'

'I fought the lawn and the lawn won.'

Lawn Order. It's a landscaping show about maintaining a tidy yard.

"Dad, can we please just buy a week wacker?"

"You see a bunny rabbit in the clouds. I see mom telling me to mow the lawn."

Ventriloquist Grave

When Fred's super deluxe leaf blower blew up yet again, he wondered where global deforestation is when you want it,

'Like the 'Cobra' and the 'Viper', my car is named for a snake too - the 'Rattler'.'

"At first I was concerned about the Earth opening up. But I was going to build a fire pit, so it actually saved me a lot of time."

"Sometimes Bob just needs a little motivation to get things done around here!"

John Ixon: Ran Out of Survival Tips.

'I'm not making a mess, Mom -- I'm becoming one with the Earth!'

Quicksand Swamp - Cheap Burial Plots.

Headstone reading 'Only Sleeping'.

'Are they fresh?'

Pranking Zombies

Man mowing lawn that grows quicker then he can cut it!

"When the heck did leaf blowers become grass blowers?!"