Workplace Whimsicalist Gifts

'Thanks for calling, Furgis. Your file was right at the top of my middle desk box.'

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

"I know you think this sort of thing is nonsense sir, and I hate to prove you wrong. But according to my crystal ball, you're not going to give me the raise I'm about to ask for."

"Can you come back next week? He's napping."

'Ms. Moffit, please inform the staff that I have morphed and send in that plump young marketing trainee.'

"Good news, chief, a computer virus destroyed all our documents."

A Poet

"Head office wants us to wear these until our corporate iamge improves."

'Running away from the circus to join the world of accountancy isn't working out as I expected. . .'

'I call it cubicilism'

'I don't care if you whistle while you work, but others find it disconcerting.'

'Henry, you've earned one of my famous pies.'

'But you said it would be all right to have an executive toy.'

Exciting suggestion in 'suggestion box'.

'All those against, raise your hand. All those in favor of ice cream, scream.'

'I try to encourage creativity.'

"It's face painting Friday."

'Not now Susan - I'm busy.'

"No experience preferred...we will train!"

'See you tomorrow!' says artist to the fruit that has been posing for him.

"I'm sorry - he's just left the office..."

Bureaucrats on a windmill.

"The dish and the spoon? Huh. I did not see that coming."

'Well, thanks for coming in. We'll get back to you.' The search for Big Foot continues.

'This is where we bring people we're thinking of hiring as decision makers.'

Interviewer reads Clown's CV and a custard pie pops out.

"I think you are meant to delegate"

"We stir the brew all morning, Marissa comes in whenever, stirs the brew for an house, takes a smoke break, goes on her phone, we stir the brew, do some chanting, the sun comes up, whatever, we're still stirring, Marissa's on her phone again, and I'm, like, 'Seriously, Marissa?'"

"Polly doesn't want THAT cracker."

'How soon can you start?'

School

"We try to keep it light-hearted in this office. Otherwise, you patients would depress the hell out of us."