Workplace Compliance Gifts

'Please leave the light on, dear. I'm afraid there might be OSHA inspectors under the bed.' 'Managers at Night.'

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

'You'll like this, gang ? it's an 'eyes-only' list of 'shady-but-tolerated' loopholes allowed by the Securities and Exchange Commission.'

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

'I've decided to step down as your CEO in order to spend more time in jail...'

'Germaine, what did you do with my desk?'

'What's wrong now?'

'It's a lateral move, you'll now be getting all of Kramer's work too.'

BBC - Crisis Management, Damage Control and Liability Supervision.

"I was hoping there'd be no meetings here."

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

"In the event of an actual S.E.C. investigation, legal representation will drop from the ceiling."

"He's the chief watchdog, who watches over all the other watchdogs—but this must be his night off."

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

'Yes, can I help you?'

'Bit of a staffing problem, Boss. We haven't got any left.'

National Boss Monument.

'You'll get five paid sick days, plus an additional two when you're shedding your skin.'

"The boss likes people with strong convictions. You're hired."

"Wake up Thomas, it's not 2020. There's no Zoom camera to turn off to hide yourself."

"Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?"

"We'd better watch Cranston. He looks like a whistleblower."

"You're hired. Now, I'll show you your desk, the break room, and the dented wall you're allowed to beat your head against."

Lady Justice and Confidential Files

'Frankly, our dental plan bites.'

"He was orphaned at an early age and raised by two giant moths."

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

Torn-Off Mouse.

"Good morning Rudy. I suppose you're wondering why I've summond you....It's time for your annual performance review...."

"Yes, social media's a great way to express your opinions - shame you feel 'ignored and unappreciated by an aloof, faceless boss' - but that's because I haven't a clue who you are or what you do around here!"

"I'll be honest... there are books by James Joyce that are easier to follow than these bad boys."