Workplace Comedy Admirer Gifts

"And if you do any work, put it here."

'Yes, can I help you?'

Desk boxes: 'IN...DELEGATE'

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

'Let me worry about the one percent inspiration, you just take care of the 99 percent perspiration.'

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

'I'm promoting you to project coordinator because you seem to have an overall view of things.'

"There are no big jobs, only small machines."

"It used to Casual Friday. Now it's Furlough Friday."

'We have a strict don't-ask-don't-tell policy for salaries.'

'Stop saying 'how high?' until I say 'jump'.'

'If you have nothing to do don't come round here and do it.'

'I don't know what he does, but I'm afraid to ask.'

"They found a use for that old paper shredder."

Businessman: 'We're like one big family here, because of all the nepotism.'

'It's settled then. Your people will meet with my people if they ever get me any people.'

"I appreciate the effort Carl, but I don't think you understand the swarm concept."

'Now that you've moved in and unpacked, Higgins, we'd like you to start thinking outside of the box.'

'We're very proud of you, Jenkins. Keep up the good work.'

"Greetings, Earthling - Are you a worker or a drone?"

'Gerald, it's so nice to see you finally getting closer to your employees.'

Gary misread the new policy on 'Free Thinking' in the work place.

"'Tis but a scratch — in America, I'd still have to go in for work today."

"According to your brain scan, you just don't want to go back to work."

'Your resume seems in order, Mr. Lupo, but would you explain exactly why you want to work here> Mr. Lupo...?

Indecision and Outrage Trays

'JB, TS is waiting to see you and GR has just arrived.'

'Here's your workplace. You will find out company is not big on CCTV cameras or punch clocks.'

'I fetch, but it hasn't helped my career any.'

Earl suspends his disbelief.

Two doctors holding hands

"I absolutely guarantee your workloads will not increase."

'I've got an exciting new assignment for you. You're going to share one salary.'

The president of a company see a sign: While you were out we hit the lottery!

"I may need you to take the fall for the Swanson mess. So, goeth with pride."