Work Relations Gifts

'I find that coming in late and leaving early makes the day go by faster.'

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

"Keep your money, sir. I'm on strike!"

The Hockey World

'I like people.. but not a whole lot.'

"I'm a bit concerned the staff don't respect me, they've given me a nickname."

'That was when I closed five distribution centres, mothballed a factory and sacked 3,000 workers.'

'I'm not saying he's going to chew you out, but he skipped breakfast and lunch.'

"Before we begin, we'd like to remind you that we're an employee owned company."

'Contested elections for managing partner are always going to cause a bit of upset.'

'Haven't they found you a chair, yet Cludmore?'

Goodenow & Bettman: We have a deal Bob! But do we have any fans left?

'So this is the company's new mission statement.'

Team Building Exercises

Unfortunately, Lyle had already sent nasty e-mails to his boss, three vice-presidents and the CEO.

"Alright, fire me. But I'm taking back your "World's Greatest Boss" coffee mug!"

"Your employees have lost faith in your ability to pretend to care about them."

"Under our new definition of 'what is a sale?', he hasn't made any this year."

'No raise, but we can make your desk and chair one-inch taller.'

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"Between you and me he's not the easiest man in the world to work for."

'I just wanted to slip in and say hi.'

'I'll take that as a screwed up ball of paper bouncing off my head then?'

"I'm aware that you brought a high-powered agent...are you aware that this job pays $26,382 and nine cents per year?"

"Your first job is to learn to recognize your boss' voice on the phone."

The Shepherd's Staff. . .

'Nothing cements the relationship like the chance to get it in writing.'

'It's important to be able to express anger, Winthrop, but not in my presence.'

'I don't like your attitude, Peterson, whatever it is.'

'In grandfather's day, the government didn't coddle workers, and we got along just great.'

'Please give me the strength to ask for a raise without my voice breaking into an annoying falsetto and my brow all sweaty.'

'I'll give you this, Henderson - you're no worse than anyone else.'

"Do you suppose Beatriz looks over here and sees a hardworking young man who's maybe a little shy, a little handsome, but who thinks she's totally cool?"

"His words, not mine."