Work-life Jester Gifts

'We like your zip-a-dee. You need to work on your dooh-dah.'

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

'The lads at the office still talk about the day you told the boss what to do with his job...'

Working hours.

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

Born In Captivity.

'Don't worry about it. If at first we don't succeed, we can do it later and get paid time-and-a-half for it.'

Your Work/Life Balance Is Off. Shall I Auto-Correct?

Laptop Dancing.

'I'm looking fo someone who can make me laugh.'

The Great Pyramid of Paperwork

The Buck Never Stops.

'Mr. Coleman is on vacation. Would you care to hold?'

"I’ve got to take this. It’s someone who isn’t obsessed with summer fun."

'Call me in the morning. In the afternoon, I'm out in the field.'

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

'You obviously took my suggestion to reduce stress to the extreme.'

"Ok weekend! I hope you can make up for that awful week!"

'Nigel, what have I told you about bringing your work home with you?'

"I wanted a Meticulous Monday or a Thorough Thursday report. This reads more like a Frivolous Friday."

'Clear out your desk, Randy. ...NEXT!'

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

'I solve so many work problems at home.'

'Of course, the toll on my personal life has been enormous.'

'Looks like no Christmas bonus this year.'

"This is bad work, Edwards! Bad! Bad! Bad! Bad!"

'I'll be late for dinner Dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

"People just don't realise how stressful this job is. . . I used to have hair!"

"No, our company doesn't provide day care or maternity leave."

Email Notifications

"Don't tell me you're not hungover, it's nine a.m. and you just clocked out."

When Pro Athletes Enter The Workforce.

"The job is yours. You're a jerk, we're all jerks, I think it'll be a great fit!"

"We've doubled our staff in the last six months." (Smith and Smith - baby in playpen behind desk).