Wool Whiz Gifts

'I want to get this scarf finished before the wool runs out.'

The first car accident.

"Yes, also it keeps you fit."

'He's the best sheepdog I ever had.'

'I think he's doing ok, the coach says he has the attention span of a goldfish.'

"The next dance will be ladies' choice."

It appears to be some sort of computer virus.

'Hey, Bob, can you get this itch on my chin? It's driving me nuts.'

Substance Abuse Seminar: How Not To Get Hooked!

Prawn Amend

The Invention of the Wheel

"So we've managed to consolidate all our multinational 24 hour hotline support centres down to one Single Point of Contact... and here he is."

Woman knitting a washing line.

Man on a unicycle trying to guard credit from nasty 'Bankruptcy'.

'I need both hands for steering.'

"Don't forget your gunfighting helmet."

"Just a trim and tidy-up, please."

Apex Dictionaries Co - sign reads: Clowsed,bak at too.

The Internet - Now available in bookstores

'Hey! -- I invented that, too!', 'It's that nut Al-Gor again.'

'This is just the first step -- next, I invent the Teamsters' Union!'

'Well, according to this website, the internet no longer exists!'

"I was doing pretty well in the stock market until I discovered there were laws."

'What do you mean, you just sell coffee? I don't understand, what kind of shop is that?'

Sportknitting

Um... Can I get an 'L', Pat?

At 4 years old most kids can say easy straightforward sentences.

First Speeding Fine.

Millipede motorist

"Bangin’ rims. Sears?"

Johann Strauss

'To explain this extremely complex new imaging system, we've brought in Chuckles.'

Exercise Car.

"'Thank you for sending us your manuscript,' she exclaimed. 'You're welcome,' I retorted. 'Unfortunately, it's not what we are looking for,' she opined. 'How disappointing,' I remarked."

"Maybe we should stop making them on a hill."