Wool Whiz Gifts

'I want to get this scarf finished before the wool runs out.'

The first car accident.

"Yes, also it keeps you fit."

'He's the best sheepdog I ever had.'

'I think he's doing ok, the coach says he has the attention span of a goldfish.'

It appears to be some sort of computer virus.

"The next dance will be ladies' choice."

'Hey, Bob, can you get this itch on my chin? It's driving me nuts.'

Prawn Amend

The Invention of the Wheel

Substance Abuse Seminar: How Not To Get Hooked!

"So we've managed to consolidate all our multinational 24 hour hotline support centres down to one Single Point of Contact... and here he is."

Woman knitting a washing line.

Man on a unicycle trying to guard credit from nasty 'Bankruptcy'.

'I need both hands for steering.'

"Just a trim and tidy-up, please."

"Don't forget your gunfighting helmet."

Apex Dictionaries Co - sign reads: Clowsed,bak at too.

The Internet - Now available in bookstores

'Well, according to this website, the internet no longer exists!'

'This is just the first step -- next, I invent the Teamsters' Union!'

"I was doing pretty well in the stock market until I discovered there were laws."

'Hey! -- I invented that, too!', 'It's that nut Al-Gor again.'

'What do you mean, you just sell coffee? I don't understand, what kind of shop is that?'

Sportknitting

Johann Strauss

First Speeding Fine.

Millipede motorist

"Bangin’ rims. Sears?"

At 4 years old most kids can say easy straightforward sentences.

Um... Can I get an 'L', Pat?

'To explain this extremely complex new imaging system, we've brought in Chuckles.'

Exercise Car.

"'Thank you for sending us your manuscript,' she exclaimed. 'You're welcome,' I retorted. 'Unfortunately, it's not what we are looking for,' she opined. 'How disappointing,' I remarked."

"Maybe we should stop making them on a hill."