Women's Stories Fan Gifts

'It's been so long since I've been laid I hardly remember how to fake an orgasm.'

The Fourth Little Pig

Saint George and the Drag Queen

'Congratulations on breaking through the glass ceiling of the company downstairs. However, I will be sending you a repair bill.'

"Bram Stoker's Bambi"

Little Buttercup HMS Pinafore

Romeo & Juliet & Ron

The Awful Lawfuls Chapter 10

This side is the gag reel.

"Tonight I'm getting together with pals to sit around and croak."

'I made my own list of My World's 100 Most Powerful Women!'

'Ha! Ha! The Wooin' O't!'

Moby Dick

"I'm less a role model than a cautionary tale."

'Sigh! So that's what love is all about...'

'I told you we should have done the balloon toss.'

Malaprop Man! Adventures. Malaprop Man! Where have you been? At a stupor her comet confection! Did many of your fellow heroes show up? We had a great turnabout! Backman and the Incredible Bulk were there! So was Caption Americ, the Flush, Wander Woman and Plasterman! Very impressive. Who was the most popular with the fans? I think I was the main distraction! I have no doubt at all about that!

'Now that's what I call a really old tree!'

"At lease we managed to stop the leak before the water reached 'E' Deck."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. I thought we were just dating."

Ask A Silly Question.

Suffrage - Franchise for Females

'Oh Ernie, you're a louse, but I love you.'

Romulus and Remus

"Well, how was I supposed to know you were saving them for something special?"

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

A declaration - man tells a girl that she has stolen his heart.

'We can always hope he's a zombie.'

"No, Mr. Kurlander, I don't have, nor have I ever had, a recipe for cranberry muffins."

Bertolt Brecht

"Run for your life! It's the Lesbian Liberation Front!"

Pirates find out treasure is a piggy bank.

"Back in the News, men are paid more than women."

"Pop, tell me again how Jazz came up the river from New Orleans."

'It's an unauthorized biography of the Chief.'