Wizard Wonder Gifts

"Let's forget the Wizard and go see Dr. Oz!"

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

Miss America IQ Pageant

Astral Projection

Nerd tryouts.

'I have a feeling we are not in Kansas anymore.'

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

D.I.Y

',,,And we'd really like a heart for the Tin Man,,,'

"This realm isn't big enough for both of our killer outfits."

"So long, boys. I'm off to the big city to try my hand at chainsaw sculpture."

'Take two eyes of newt, and call me in the morning.'

"I've decided to add a little magic, so, everyone, say hello to my little friend."

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

"Fair's fair. I cooked the dinner, so you can clean the cauldron!"

"Of course, it's MY hair - I've still got the receipt!"

Remember, honey, abracadabra doesn't work anymore. Now it's command, option, shift.

'Well, I think it's very creative of the dog to make a wig from his shed hair.'

"I was doing well in school and planning to be a computer programmer - but somewhere along the way I must have taken a wrong turn."

"Victims of out-sorcery."

"What a load of hocus-pocus!"

'You have received a grant from the king - his secret incantation to chant over your experiments.'

'Between you and me Wizard, is it true that you intellectuals have pointed heads?'

"Look at the state of this place! Don't you ever use that thing to sweep up?!"

Emma Watson

"Since my divorce I thought I'd never laugh again. Then I noticed your toupee."

Obama of Oz.

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

"Oh well, I'm off the see the orthopedist."

Merlin realizes too late that he shouldn't be hexing while driving.

'..and one for the pot.'

"Okay brother Bickle, you can keep your underpants on"

Dog Walker

Conference Room. I don't have the heart to tell him it wasn't a compliment when the boss said "in every brainstorming session Ernie is a ray of sunshine."

"Right! It's a heart op, neurosurgery and counselling. And I'll have the Wiz"