Witty Animal Lover Gifts

'If I wanted to fetch something, I'd chase a mouse.'

Cheshire giraffe!

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

Dog Dressed to Eat

"This resumé has the kind of sizzle we're looking for."

Pin the blame on the donkey.

"And I suppose you expect me to pick that up?"

Dog wearing jumper to hide his spots.

'My dad must like you, or he would have charged by now.'

Cat with Crown.

"Would you thrive in a hostile work environment?"

'Your disgusting behaviour has been almost human in nature!'

"To be honest, it just collects dust."

"How long can you stay out here before your toes wrinkle?"

"I've never known a child like him. He's always finding things."

'It's her signature dish.'

'You seem pretty wound up today.'

"Forget about eating homework, I need you to carry my backpack!"

Balding dog

'Wanna play? We need another body... er... one more player.'

'Well yes, they sent me into space: But to be perfectly honest, I had no idea as to what was going on...'

"Sorry, dude. You've been voted out of the pack!"

What to do if a rhino owes you money....

'What are you doing?!'

Ostritch Gangsters.

'Saint Francis changes his mind about animals'

George Michael In The Toilet.

'And the winner for best supporting animal in a frozen ready meal goes to...'

Funky Facts: True or false, Seagulls drink both fresh and salt water?

'As a kid, whenever I was at a petting zoo, I got bit, butted and stomped on.'

"When Human Resources said that we needed a more diverse workforce I'm not sure THAT'S what they meant!"

"Funny hey, my mum's advice on 'travel essentials' is 'don't pack a toothbrush'..."

Mrs. Claus finds a job for Santa's reindeer in the off season.

"Noah was having second thoughts about allowing the beavers onto the ark. . ."

"We'll have the grilled penguin."