Wise Monkey Collector Gifts

The advent of profanity: Noah to 3 monkeys: 'Only pairs are allowed on my ark, so one of you has to go!'

"Son, it's time you learned the benefits of sitting around doing nothing."

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

Jane Goodall's study of primates in the land of oz didn't go as well as her previous projects.

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

ZOO

"Did you just do a rooster?"

'Hi! I'm on the tree.'

Just back from the psychological research center, Stanly couldn't help but think that he lived with a bunch of baboons.

'I wonder how Curious George fits into all this?'

"Influence this."

'And though he died during the hunt, we can only assume that George L Jones would want this new species of butt-faced clown monkey to forever bear his name.'

Life, love and a lot of bananas.

'The best way to teach my son is by example, you know: Monkey see, monkey do...'

"I don't know, do you think we evolved from the sock monkey?"

'Shakespeare's Hamlet word for word - and I who always thought it was a crazy joke.'

"There's so much pressure to like monkeys."

"So how long have you been working the business?"

'Look, if we're going to make this business work, we need to stop eating all the stock.'

'I thought your new year's resolution was to get the monkey off your back!'

'This is not what I expected when you said we were going to help an endangered species...'

"Social media makes it impossible to see, hear or speak no evil."

'Sir, it's those monkeys we sent into space in 1959... They're back!'

'Did you bring any money? - Enlightenment doesn't grow on trees, you know!'

Monkey dropping apples on Newton's head.

"Have you tried sitting in a box?"

A good executive is known by the company he keeps solvent.

'Ooga says we're descended from people!'

'I don't think the Doctor will be able to see any more patients today!'

"No, I'm only interested in dogs and cats."

"Hold on - 1...2...3...?"

"I said it was time to send in the DRAGOONS!"

"What's another word for evolution?"

"This one? This one? Listen, make up your mind, or I;m picking out a flea for you."