Wise Guy Admirer Gifts

'You wouldn't want to know.'

"Nature speaks to me of God’s presence, yet God is a total stranger to the restless world of men." "Why the #!@* is there no signal?!"

"There has been a sharp increase in his cantankerousness."

"I love this time of year."

"Will she know what this is in reference to?"

Leonardo's first drawing

Candle Moment

'Huh, that Will Shakespeare, a man of few words.'

"He's such a gentleman, he didn't use a 'mating call' to attract me: he's developed a 'please join me on a date' call..."

"When life gives me lemons, I know twenty-six ways to kill a man with a lemon."

Scale indicates the value of books.

Wilhelm Dilthey

"How's tricks?"

'He's a successful investment advisor.'

'Don't tell me we've been following the wrong light!'

Einstein's most embarrassing moment

"You have to admire their ingenuity at least -- They're burying their apple cores."

Poet and Peasant

Actually, I'm not really a guru...

"You can try all you want, but being smooth is just something you're born with."

Three wise men following a lightbulb

"I used to live each dray to the fullest. Now I'm satisfied with every other Tuesday."

A Cool Invisible Cow.

'My problem is that I'm a nice guy.'

If you think I've been witty and charming so far, wait until you see the word balloons I have back at my house.

Telepath for Ms Thompson...

Counsellor is an owl.

"I'm not looking for absolute wisdom. . . just enough to get by."

A Bad Time for John Thomas.

Shoe Tree

Thomas Edison's brother, Wilmer...couldn't even figure out how to turn on the light.

"Why do I get lumbered with Myrrh!"

'Bill eventually came to regret selling his sole to the Devil.'

'Remember Buck, even geniuses have midlife career changes.'

I thought we came from that way. Are you sure there's no South Star? I told you we should have asked Mary for directions. The three wise men on their way home.