Winged Wit Pillows

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

Snowprov

Backfire

"Stop the drama. Take that wig off and wait 'till spring like everyone else."

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

Miss America IQ Pageant

Doggone

Man cutting hedge next to two heads impaled on sticks. Signs beneath say 'You missed a bit' and 'You can do mine next'.

Czarcasm

'Wait a minute - How do we break a tie?'

'Don't fall for all that...you should see him first thing in the morning.'

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

Snowman of the Apes

It is believed dear Jack finally figured out women. Trouble is, he died laughing before he could tell anybody.

"Pregnant!... How did that happen? We took precautions, like not having sex!"

"I had a low birth weight but a high birthright."

The Frankenstein snowman.

Paper Boy

"Will you be ordering A La Carte, or heading straight over to the trough?"

'Fancy a swift half?'

"Since my divorce I thought I'd never laugh again. Then I noticed your toupee."

'I don't do 'Goodbyes' ...'

"Your sense of humor has gone from dry to arid. . ."

'He never listened to his mother!'

"We'll be single again in Heaven, right?"

'You got twenty years for hunting without a license? Kind of stiff, isn't it?'

"If you could have a dinner conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?"

"Oh I don't mind the jogging, but I think you tricked me. When you asked if I wanted to exercise, I thought you said, extra fries!"

'My client stands before you, a jury of his whittling peers ...'

"Oh, my husband is a great provider: his hunting success rate is close to 30%..."

'Always the wise guy.'

"A road yet uncrossed, My heart takes wing at the sight - The journey is life."

Groom decoration on wedding cake makes good his escape.