Wineries Gifts

Pete Townshend Vineyards

Grape vines think alike.

Butler and his friend drinking in a cellar

'Excellent grape jelly, Mother -- I detect Macabeo, Arinto, Rotgipfler, and just a hint of Hondarrabi Zuri.'

'Toast'

"Here's a nice white wine. Goes great with grooming and hairballs.

"Very wishy-washy. . . really lacks conviction. . ."

In the Guru District

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger

A Good Batch.

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

The Vineyard

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'A cheeky red?'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

Wine Lady

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

Sauvignon Bonk

Bacchus.

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

'... And this is my cellar.'

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

'I swear, if he didn't always pick up the tab, I'd never go drinking with him.'

Yoga vs. Prosecco

'You wanted to be a wine maker in the worst way, Paul - and you've succeeded.'

Wine enthusiast tries to make his way to Cork.

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

'Which wine goes best with 'the old man and the sea'?'

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"