Wine Warrior Gifts

Yoga for Alcoholics

I just watched a documentary about the dangers of drinking and it petrified me. No more TV for me!

The 1/4 K No-Spill Challenge

'The trend toward less alcohol consumption at office parties is having a bad effect on my health. Wine cooler bottles are heavier than beer cans.'

'Let him struggle; it's the only exercise he gets.'

' I don't want a nice little wine - get me something aggressive !! '

'I figured I was in hell when I saw the wine list - 800 selections, and they're all white zinfandels.'

Man battles for his life against 'A Very Lively Little Red'

'I'm from down the street. Your customer ordered our wine because it is better than yours.'

In the Guru District

The Vineyard

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

Wine Lady

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

French wine

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

'Note to self: Like coffee, homemade coffee wine should be available in decaf, too.'

'This is the last time we hire former Cirque du Soleil members as stompers.'

"It was a cheese and wine party but the mice got there first!"

'What wine goes with comfort foods?'

"I make it myself!"

"Honestly, Paula, I don't know what I'd do without our daily keggers."

'I don't think that's what they mean by reducing the wine.'

Things I've learned...

A couple sit in front of their RV drinking wine while looking at birds sitting in front of a a small RV in a tree also drink wine.

"I only need shade for my wine."

"You've ordered comfort food. May I recommend a comfort wine?"

'Hey, Grandma! Watch how long I can hold my breath underwater!'

"We love each other very much, and we concur on alcohol and coffee. But we're unable to come to an agreement on meat and fish."

Scarpia's Palace