Wine Glass Collectors Gifts

"Did you order a starter?"

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

'A cheeky red?'

Wine Lady

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

'Eight years old, huh? If it's so good, why didn't somebody drink it eight years ago?'

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

Wine Selection 'Here we are. Our cheapest house wine. Would the gentleman care to smell the twisty cap?'

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

Bottle Bank: For the Colour Blind.

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

Wine enthusiast tries to make his way to Cork.

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

Tommy Cooper at the bottle bank - Glass, Bottle, Bottle, Glass..

'You sent your wife to get a bottle of wine from the wine cellar? Your jet doesn't have a wine cellar.'

'Al, that hopeless romantic, sends me love letters written in wine. I just wish he'd use red instead of white.'

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

Glass and Porcelain Store: Elephants must remain outside.

Just the one...

'French hypermarket' ' 5 English or less' till

true love.

"Where do you remember last seeing your glasses?"

"My wife commissioned a portrait of me."

"I've had these glasses since I was a kid, when my doctor told me I'd grow into them..."

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

kangaroos hopping around in a vat of grapes to make wine for Australian wine company.

Portfolio, 2011

'I'm filling in for the sommelier. We have a fine shiraz today for only $39. It's 14.7 alcohol, a Class 1B flammable, so if I see you consume it near an open flame, I'll have to cite you.'

"Quick swig first?"

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

'I've written six books on wine; owned my own winery and taught a wine class for two years. My next goal is to taste some.'

Glasses on, Crazy Cowman's secret identity was safe

'No, I am not finished with the comics section, now give me back my glasses!'