Wine And Dine Wanderer Gifts

'When he refused to leave the pub I thought it best to let sleeping dogs lie.'

Pete Townshend Vineyards

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

Wine enthusiast tries to make his way to Cork.

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'

Why Cupid is not allowed to drink alcohol anymore...

"The chef recommends the tilapia. However, I really like the vodka."

'Toast'

"I'm getting plasma, iron and platelets. RH positive!"

"Would madam like to sniff the resealable cap?"

"This time when they show us their latest acquisition, we'll gush regardless."

'Okay, that's 4 for the Malbec, 3 for the Chianti and 2 for the Merlot. You want to go with that, or wait for the write-in votes?'

"This is a big wine. I recommend you order some big food."

Wine and Cheese

'There's over 500,000 different wines? Bernie, we've got work to do!'

"Don't feel bad. The rest of us can't hold our liquor either."

Still the Same

'My first day in our vineyard wasn't a total loss, honey. I found two pennies.'

'The brochure says their wines are distinctive. I think I know why.'

Wine-tasting Tour.

'Really, a foreign wine? What will the NSA think?'

Dogs with alcohol collars.

"You want fries with that Chardonnay?"

'Enjoy your meal, sir, but remember -- no kinky stuff!'

Bishop reads menu which features only loaves, fishes, water and wine.

"You may now begin venting about each other's wedding-prep behavior."

'I'll leave a path of bread crumbs in case you need to find me.'

Winery tours.

'I'm not putting it out. There's enough oak in this Chardonnay to keep this fire going all night.'

"I'm too old to go Dutch."

'Here's the difference between sommelier school and the real world: I just got asked to recommend a vegan wine to pair with a bacon double cheeseburger.'

'SPRING water-in the middle of summer???'

"Carpe vino! Seize the wine!"