Wine Aficionados Gifts

Oh look, Marv - We're just in time for the running of the fools!

'Am I mistaken, or did you arrange this for my birthday once before?'

"We REALLY do get better with age."

"And this latest robot vacuum can fetch a glass of wine while it cleans your floors!"

"For what it's worth, 'Yo-ho-ho and chilled Pinot Grigio' actually rhymes."

"The wine is supposed to breathe, Martin, not hyperventilate."

'...Now we'd be expecting turning water into a decent '67 vintage at the VERY LEAST!'

National Debt: Deep, long lasting and sure to generate a lot of interest.

Young Love/Elderly love.

Vegetables at a bar with vegetable bathroom signs in the background.

'Merry Christmas sleepyhead! We're out of wine out here...'

'We'll have two glasses of your chardonnay with the most aggressive advertising campaign.'

'Do you think they're here because they're interested in the topic, or because they think there will be samples?'

"Red wine with poultry? Seriously?"

"I'm gonna kick your glass!"

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

In the Guru District

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

'A cheeky red?'

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

Wine Lady

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

"Now I really hate poetry."

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

Bacchus.

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

Sauvignon Bonk

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'