Wild Swimming Enthusiast Gifts

"I'm just off for a wild water swim!"

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

"Oh boy, that was a huge belly-flop..."

Frank, this is carrying safe sex too far.

'Well, I guess it's your father's fault for mounting that backboard on the barn in the first place. ... OK, one game...'

A man runs on the water from a shark.

'Dad, can you teach me to swim?' 'Well, I'm not much of a swimmer, but I can teach you to tread water. I do that every day at work.'

"The peasants have lost all respect for the moat."

"Norman's really into wild paddling."

'My problem is if I have one, I can't quit!'

Lapdogs

'Yeh it's just that I haven't been able to swim on my front,since my boob job.'

Lawyer, lawyer! Get out of the water!

'You're SURE that you've played water polo before?'

'I've never done this before.'

'The prisons are full, so I'm releasing you back into the wild.'

'The swimmers line up for this, the final heat, and surprise, surprise, It's the dog paddle.'

Lost: Grizzly Bear. 8 Years Old. Loves To Sneak Up On People.

Yes, well, when you're grown up and king, your castle can have an indoor heated moat.

Rip Taylor Tide

'I always assumed you were a cat person!'

No petting in the pool!

'Okay, Jimmy, you're been in there way too long now...'

'Yes, this is the deep end.'

A couple of polar bears enjoy their new swimming pool - a refurbished igloo . . .

'When I said shock the pool, I meant with chlorine!'

'I'm all for answering the call of the wild, but Bill really takes it to the extreme!'

Bill Shankland

Motor Channel Crossing.

We know being raised by wolves isn't ideal, but think of the amazing essay you'll have on your college application!

'Help! Cold! Help!'

"I rescue swimmers. He rescues phones dropped by swimmers."

"Do you want to watch politicians promise to make American great again, or watch Olympics and bask in the glory of Katie Ledecky and Michael Phelps?"

'I hope you don't think I invited you swimming just because you have a couple of webbed toes.'

"Don't high five the lion again."