Wild Swimming Gifts

'Help! Cold! Help!'

Man preparing to swim the channel covers himself in goose fat and notices that a man preparing to paddle is doing the same.

"Norman's really into wild paddling."

Bitchbark Canoe

On holiday.

'Okay, ladies! We're not just going to burn those calories, we're going to drown them!'

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

Pool attached to child's bed.

Swan Fairy Tales

"I know I'm a little early, but sometimes I need a break from that dreadfully cold weather."

'No swimming. No breathing.'

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

Bring your own inflatable.

Polar Bear ice fishing through igloo.

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

On my list of outdoor pursuits I put skinny dipping way ahead of this.

'He lives for his holidays.'

"If oceans are absorbing more carbon dioxide, why isn't this water fizzy?"

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

'I don't care if it's hot, I won't go in the water!'

Bears catching fish

Man retrives a mermaid from his swimming trunks after a swim in the sea

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

"All I did this summer was go fishing, camping, bike riding, swimming, boating, and go the movies, carnivals, fairs, concerts and games. I'm bored."

Man Fishing: Pulling sign attached to hook from fish out of water: Gone Swimmin'

Child about to jump off ironing board into bath.

"Ooooh, I bet that feels nice."

Periscope spies beautiful water-skier.

A 'Falling Rock' and a 'Deer Crossing' zone.

Sunbathers.

Endangered Species: Belgian Ostrich.

"And then, when I feel like a rum punch and breaded shrimp, I can just swim to Tony’s Trattoria."