Whiskey Whisperer Gifts

"I actually prefer same sex - as long as it doesn't involve sex."

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

"To shuffle off this mortal coil in some saloon- it was his dream."

"I'm not a mean drunk—I'm just damned insensitive."

"Please welcome Big Alcohol."

"Impossible as it may seem, Fred, the fate of the world depends on this drink and six or seven more just like it."

'I'm sorry, we don't serve spirits.'

"For the last time...where did you hide my Scotch?"

'I have my scotch and soda clock.'

Gentleman's Club Scene

"I make sure I age my whiskey."

"I'm drinking far too much. Last Saturday night I overindulged and left a 500 dollar tip."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

Nothing beats the love of a good cat.

Cat Heaven vs Mouse Hell.

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

Woman setting out a dinner party with name cards labeled cat person, dog person.

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

"We're hoping for a really smooth wine here."

'As Chuck's definition of terroir dragged past the 20-minute mark, Suzy concluded, the longer the explanation, the less likely you know what the word means.'

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

My other cello is a Stradivari

'Honestly, now that Tiger is neutered I'm perfectly happy just cuddling.'

Violin Practise

"I'm getting cinnamon, brandy, nutmeg, a hint of Alsatian."

"I'm not his best friend. But he is in my extended network."

Cat Zoom Meeting

"Dang, there goes another piece of the wife's good china. You see father, it's

'Oh that just means he wants you to rub his tummy.'

"Sure, it's been a tough quarter, but somehow we always land on our feet."

"I think I blew the promotion when I started doing some personal hygiene grooming during the interview."

"People who don't believe in soulmates just haven't met the right animal."

"Dad! The bathroom pipes are clogged up!"

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'