Whimsical Marketer Gifts

"Monsieur Proust, we would like to discuss product placement for one of our cakes...."

Cats-can-sell anything advertising agency.

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

Trojan Hurdler.

"That's our new church mascot."

''Now we're the only yard in the block with a blue apple tree!'

'This wasn't what I meant by viral marketing...but if you can get it to work.'

"I know R&D feels that the product warrants at least two 'really'."

Woman throwing giant pot.

"We can succeed if our target audience is not made up of rational human beings."

Floss Street Vendor

"I've got a great idea! By adding the words "and associates" to my business name, no one will every suspect I'm really just one person with a phone and a web site working out of my bedroom!"

The marketing is out there now. People all know the pizzas are prepared on the premises. So why no customers?

'The guy who made me is a fan of Magritte.'

A potter paints a barcode on a pot.

These Sales Reps get more aggressive every year.

Sugar Fix.

"Prospectus in not spelt P...R...O...A...G...A...N...D...A."

"All right, Thompson. The board concedes that this quarter's economic growth does look very much like a kitty.

'It's the philosophy of the company that truth in advertising begins at home.'

"Who knew we'd be a desirable demographic?"

'The good news is consumer confidence is up. And the REALLY good news is consumer gullibility is Way up.'

'I'm sending him out to drum up new business.'

'But what do you sell?'

'The incorporation of the name of Cit-Bolon-Turn the God of Healing into your logo will resonate with everyone who has even the faintest knowledge of Mayan religious nomenclature!'

'Unethical advertising uses falsehoods to deceive the public. Ethical advertising uses the truth to deceive the public.'

"Love's OK, but there's no money in it. For the right price, I could help people fall in love with your products."

Child selling cold lemonade in the winter

"Where should we target our advertising dollars? "Hold on, I'm checking my website."

'This space could be working for you' - entrepreneurs concert.

Doomsday marketing

'...hmm ...I predict an upturn in profits this year.'

"Let's be honest here and admit we're targeting the 'stupid-with-their-money' demographic."

"Psst! I got mantras. You need a mantra? Mantras right here..."

Cat chess