Weight Watchers With A Sense Of Humor Pillows

"I have put on a few pounds, but it's mostly water weight."

"All diet books, 69 cents a pound."

"No. I can't 'let it out a bit'. It's armour, you'll just have to go on a diet!"

'The second diet of my diet is always the easiest. By then, I'm off my diet.'

"My Weight Watchers meeting's tonight. I'd better get inside."

"Look, I can still fit into the suit I wore during the last paradigm shift."

'Don't step on that in your bare feet - my mom does and screams.'

'Will we ever get a morning-after pill for over-eating?'

'I don't want you to give up eating entirely -- just the food part.'

"Really, yes, I'm on a diet too: I need to almost double my summer weight before the start of the winter hibernation..."

"Nice try Mrs Wimslow"

'Well my lightest ever was 7lbs 4oz. . .'

'Don't rush me. I'm adding up the calories!'

''Why, I feel as light as a feather,' thought Shirley, 'I don't think I'll go on that diet, after all!'

'She was always very proud of her figure.'

'How is the new diet going?'

'Wait! Let me clip my nails first.'

'My body is a temple. A temple full of fat people.'

'Do you have to explain nutrition with a pie chart?'

"I remember the days of skim, 1% and even 2%. Now, it's right to the whole milk section."

'To make matter worse, our combined weight is higher than our credit score.'

'Nothing grows in the shade.'

'You are 14st 3lb..But then, you are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders.'

Your weight and fortune. What you'll weigh now...what you'll weigh 10 years from now.

'Doris, I know how much you weigh. Step on the scale and I'll hand you the fish.'

1) Daddy Long Legs 2) Daddy Large Pituitary.

The hand's gone around twice.

"The diet section is located next to the snack bar."

Muscle Music.

"I said, I'm on a garlic diet. So far, I've lost 5 pounds and 12 friends."

'Does the suicide clause apply if he eats himself to death?'

'I'm on this 3 month diet...it only lasts a week, but it feels like 3 months.'

City Health Club - Ask about our no more than necessary exercise class.

Scale SOS!

Portions of a thin and fat man.