Weed Aficionados Gifts

'Are you kidding, I used to get high with Smokey all the time.'

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

"I've seen a tulip before."

Couple using thier new garden hose in the rain

'What great fall blooms. These flowers make yummy pumpkin pie spice!'

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

"Go ahead, tell him... Your friend is correct. Nuts are fruit. Why won't you ever believe me?"

SPOONING CACTI

'The highest court in the land.'

"Remember that half-dead sansevieria you put out on the balcony back in January of 1994, pal?"

Bonsai Exhibit

'Turn right at the Robinia pseudoacacia, pass the garden with the salvia officinalis, cross the road when you see the stranvaesia davidinia and the pub is on the left!'

'Oh yes I talk to them all the time. Except the aspidistra. Not since the argument.'

'Oh my Gawd! He's a weed!'

You have the flu. Get plenty of rest and avoid lots of fluids.

"I have my green thumb, thanks to my black 'n' blue knees!"

"It would be better with a protein, but add-ons are so expensive."

'I SAID you'd threatened to throw them out once too often!'

"Have you got any man eating plants?"

Topiary: When the written word isn't enough

"Wouldn't this one look nice shrivelled up in the kitchen?"

Cannabis Dispensary: Walk-ins awkwardly trying to look nonchalant welcome!

'What, not even a kiss first?'

"It's a letter from the council, about our window box."

A windfall pear falling straight into a bag of windfall pears.

"It's time to bring in the wax begonias and your mother."

Gardening.

"You spoil that plant!"

'They might be able to resist the candy, but no healthy child can walk by a freshly raked pile of leaves.'

We'll cling together just like the Ivy.

This plant is a lousy malingerer!

House Plant Party

"You, my tenacious weed, are trespassing!"

Try to extinguish the potting shed...brush wood ash into a neat pile - it will make valuable plant food.