Weather Jokesters Gifts

Nice conservatory!

Captain steering house through flood.

Just because I'm adapted to the cold, doesn't mean I like it!

"It's so warm that I'm laying hard boiled eggs."

"Turns out it was all water weight."

'I love it when it's sunny at festivals. It makes the mud so much warmer.'

'I swear it wasn't this cold before they invented the wind chill factor.'

"Oh goodie, pigs in a blanket."

"Shrinkage /ˈSHriNGkij/ noun: 1. the contraction of an object when cooled, 2. the 'Naked Cowboy' in Times Square on a really cold day."

How You Know It's Spring...

'I'd take that with a pinch of salt if I thought the council could spare any.'

"How did you find the weather on your holiday?"

"You think we like these extra playoff rounds?"

'Say, Fred...'

"If global warming is real, then why are winters so cold?"

"I guess the weather forecast was right."

Global Forecasting Institute

Met Office "It's a tornado watch"

"Do I know every strand back there? Nahhh! What's the worst that could happen?"

"We've got water views again."

Summer Solstice Stonehenge

'No, not abominable. The normal kind.'

'It's frozen solid Darling: We're not meant to have aquariums...'

'Are you kidding, I used to get high with Smokey all the time.'

"Hot enough for you?"

'He's running a high fever.'

Naked man walking in the rain under an umbrella.

'His lungs were fine. He died of hypothermia from all those fag-breaks outside.'

"It must be a lot colder than I thought."

Man Sledging on his car

"Shadow? All these years I thought that was my ex-wife!"

The Honesty Channel's Weather Forecast

"Some cruise! It rained for the entire trip!"

UK snow warning.

"I'm allergic to ice."