Joking About Weather Gifts

Weather forecasters tell lies!

Captain steering house through flood.

Just because I'm adapted to the cold, doesn't mean I like it!

Dave, determined to go green by using only solar powered tools, will hereafter check weather reports before making bids.

'Where is the global warming when you want it?'

'I love it when it's sunny at festivals. It makes the mud so much warmer.'

'I swear it wasn't this cold before they invented the wind chill factor.'

"Shrinkage /ˈSHriNGkij/ noun: 1. the contraction of an object when cooled, 2. the 'Naked Cowboy' in Times Square on a really cold day."

How You Know It's Spring...

'Today's stock rise was due to a high pressure system over wall street...'

'I'd take that with a pinch of salt if I thought the council could spare any.'

"I guess the weather forecast was right."

"If global warming is real, then why are winters so cold?"

"How did you find the weather on your holiday?"

'Say, Fred...'

Global Forecasting Institute

'I am wearing my bikini!'

"You think we like these extra playoff rounds?"

"We've got water views again."

Summer Solstice Stonehenge

'No, not abominable. The normal kind.'

Met Office "It's a tornado watch"

Naked man walking in the rain under an umbrella.

'His lungs were fine. He died of hypothermia from all those fag-breaks outside.'

'It's frozen solid Darling: We're not meant to have aquariums...'

Man Sledging on his car

"It must be a lot colder than I thought."

"Hot enough for you?"

The Honesty Channel's Weather Forecast

"Some cruise! It rained for the entire trip!"

UK snow warning.

'Ten percent chance of rain sounded pretty good!'

British Weather Bureau Symbols

'It wasn't a bad hurricane. The wind was at my back for the front nine.'

"Don't sit on that cold floor. You'll get polaroids."